If you're into collectibles, know
when it's time to sell, because there is a very fine line between valuable
collectibles and worthless crap.
If you take your child to a party
hosted by a well-known drunken party girl, do not be surprised if your child
ends up on fire.
The mind of a man cannot evolve
without an occasional kick in the balls from life.
Dignity is something to be faced
not just on your deathbed, but in every bed.
Rely in your mind to accomplish as
much as it hinders.
Never wear a white shirt to an Italian
meal.
If you suddenly find yourself
surrounded by men in hard hats and orange vests, walk away quickly.
If you want something done right,
lower your standards and have someone else do it.
Men are pigs. Women are pigs as well.
Music is not meant to be listened
to in a stationary position.
Even if you don't, make sure to
fuck them like you love them.
Always be punctual, unless you're
picking up a date.
If you enjoy sex, then learn to
play the guitar. You'll get more
of it and you don't even have to play well.
Underspeak, don't overspeak.
Treat everyone with kindness,
especially if you need something from them.
(OR: If you're rude to a bank teller,
don't expect a lollipop at the end of the transaction.)
To quote Tuco in The Good, The
Bad, and the Ugly, "If you have to
shoot, shoot! Don't
talk." This applies to most
things in life.
People who speak clearly and
enunciate get more out of life than those who mumble or whisper.
Have a Happy Place.
Be a hero to someone, but don't
feel obligated to wear the tights.
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