Enigma

            Here on the dock at sunset, Hank could see that it was indeed beautiful, which further clotted the enigma convoluting his mind.  The pine planks were low on the water and extended far enough to deprive his peripheral of the forest behind him, giving the illusion that he was standing atop the lake itself, and he imagined the water lapping the piles underfoot lapped his ankles instead.  A skein of geese appeared at the pinetops in a jagged chevron and soared overhead, their honks flatly keeping time to their song of flight, floating gradually lower until they hung seemingly motionless above the water.  They coasted mere inches from the surface for a long moment during which Hank’s mouth cracked and his breath ceased, until the leader broke the water’s calm with the snowy feathers of her breech and came to a slow paddle and the others followed suit and he remembered again to breathe.

            Breathlessness was not unique to this moment; it was everywhere.  In the afternoons Hank walked the perimeter road of the property, winding around the lake and past the narrow beach with imported sand and through scores of tall pines and birch, and each day his breath was stolen by nature like it was by Princess Grace in a Hitchcock picture or by the moon in late summer when it is near and low to the horizon and the butter inside threatens to boil over.  One day he had come across a flock of wild turkeys, sixteen in all, and lost his breath.  One day he had startled a grazing buck and caused the animal to flee, which in turn startled Hank and caused his chest to pause and linger.  One day his feet crushed new-fallen leaves of vivid color and he looked up to see the air flurrying with red and orange and yellow and brown as a zephyr blew through and his lungs hung motionless, shocked by the overpowering beauty of it. 

            The enigma pounded through his brain and caused him to weep silently.  Despite the genius of this land, despite the ravishing splendor of life displayed, despite the color and charm of his environment, he still found no sense.  Despite everything, she still was dead.